Foreseeing Future

Relatives from Singapore came to visit us.
As usual, my room was very very very messy.
Believe me.
It's messy!
So, mum told me to clean up cause relatives will be coming.
To make things worse, I had to clean 2 rooms cause I messed up my previous room and the current room I'm sleeping at.
(I run to the back room to avoid memories)
Started off with my front room.
It looked like I haven't been there for ages.
So dusty!
So I swept, cleaned.......
And at the end, I cleared something which was once I treasure them so so much.
Unfortunately, I have to pack them up.
It was all the gifts from him and a few letters which I wrote to him a year ago but didn't have the courage to give them to him.
It was all about the way I felt about our relationship.
How much I dislike something,
How I wish we could mend everything back,
And so on.
There's about 8 letters.
I opened them. ( I sealed them up last time = P )
Read through every single thing that I want him to know.
Cried a lot again at that moment.
Luckily no one was home.
So many heart-breaking moments.
Each and every part of it really minimize a little trust from me towards him.
I can't believe how many sad things happened until I read those letters.
Though some letters was full of hatred.
Because I don't know how to express those stuff to him.
That's why all I do was to write them down.
Well, sacrifices made ain't appreciated.
Every single thing that he once gave to me, I still kept them well.
From my 16th birthday present, to the handphone ornament during our 100th day of 'couple-ing', 2008 valentine's flower....
Even the 1st bar of chocolate that he bought for me, I still keep the wrappers.
Does he do anything like that for me.
Perhaps... I don't know.
All I know was i was so sad and angry at the same time when he lost the 'P' that I bought for him at Singapore.
Sighhh.....
All those are memories now.
I packed everything up into a paper bag.
Including some photos that we took together.
Will be moving to new house this year end.
I didn't intend to bring along those things.
I don't want to bring sad memories along.
What should I do??
Dump it? Donate to the needys?? Or return it???

Future>> Hopefully it's a bright place where there's only sunshine and no rains or thunderstorms will get into my way!